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Home Entertainment Exclusive: It’s normal to feel the regret of missing out, says Shabana Raza Bajpayee

Exclusive: It’s normal to feel the regret of missing out, says Shabana Raza Bajpayee

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“A few big directors had approached Shabana, but the roles they offered her weren’t flattering. It was as if they were doing her a favour, and we weren’t okay with that. Offers had to justify her presence” – Manoj Bajpayee

Shabana Raza Bajpayee, professionally known as Neha, stole hearts with her innocent portrayal in films like Kareeb and Fiza. Married to Manoj Bajpayee and mother to 13-year-old Ava, Shabana is back in the movie business after a 15-year hiatus, now as a producer for the couple’s upcoming film ‘Bhaiyyaji’. She says she is open to acting parts too, provided they have some substance.
Excerpts from a conversation with the couple.

After being liked in movies like Kareeb and Fiza, you disappeared from the scene completely, and now you are back after 15 years. What led to this decision?

Shabana

: I was a hands-on mom until a year ago. Our daughter Ava is now in boarding school, so I have the time and mind space to consider other things. I was offered roles even when the OTT space came into focus, but I chose not to take them up. I thought that if I were to come back as an actor, it had to be something special. There was a time when Manoj wanted to do a certain kind of films and I told him why we don’t go ahead and produce those, so that we can follow our heart. Manoj was a little uncertain, but this progression was organic.

Manoj

: I felt that she deserves to do good work. I firmly believed that the offers she got had to justify her presence, and it shouldn’t look like a desperate comeback. A few big directors had approached her, but the roles they offered weren’t flattering. It was as if they were doing her a favour and we weren’t okay with that.

Giving up your career in your prime must not have been an easy decision. Do you regret that?

Shabana

: After my marriage, my mother was diagnosed with cancer. I decided I had to have a child before she passed away. Fortunately, she lived for many years after that and got to spend time with Ava. Back then, that was my priority. Of course, I regret missing out. When Ava was three, I did have this feeling that I wanted to work and it’s normal to feel that regret of missing out. But who was going to take care of Ava? People outside the industry don’t understand that an actor is out there working for 14-15 hours a day! One of us had to stay at home. We planned the baby, but we didn’t plan what’s next. I wanted her grandparents to spend time with her without looking at her as a responsibility, so I chose to be with her.Do I feel like I missed out on my prime as an actress? 100%. Would I have done it differently? No! I just have one child and she means the world to us.

How did the two of you meet? It seems like a match between an extrovert and an introvert.

Manoj

: We met at director Hansal Mehta’s party. She was there because of the late Rajat Mukherjee, who directed me later on. I made the first move. She was always pretty. I just don’t say it too much. Most people who knew her spoke about her beauty to me without any shame that they were talking to her husband (laughs). I love the way she has raised our daughter. She is a voracious reader. We always discuss movies with each other.

Shabana

: We both are introverts. I can become an extrovert selectively; Manoj finds it hard. We tend to be in our own space. He socialises only with select people. He is not a filmy romantic, but he is romantic. If I ask him to get a lily, he gets a bunch.

Your name was changed to Neha when you entered the movies. Some still remember you by your screen name. What are your thoughts on that?

Shabana

: Vidhu Vinod Chopra gave me the name Neha. The decision was purely commercial. My screen character’s name in Kareeb was Neha, hence the decision. It hypes the film to say introducing Neha as Neha. Was I okay with it? I didn’t care either way at that point. I am Shabana, but if I am walking down the street and someone calls me Neha, I will turn around.

Manoj

: I never liked the idea of changing names. Even I thought of changing my name long back when I entered the movies. I was told Manoj is a common name. I wanted to change my real name to Samar, but I didn’t, so I gave it to my character in Shool.
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